Not-So-Horrible Thing Happens In Iraq | The Onion - America's Finest News Source

Not-So-Horrible Thing Happens In Iraq | The Onion - America's Finest News Source

Sometimes only the Onion can really tell the truth, or tell it by not telling it!

"BAGHDAD—In a development Pentagon officials are calling not nearly as horrifying as usual, three car bombs ripped through a Baghdad marketplace Monday, killing fewer than 15 innocent civilians, severely injuring no more than 30, and merely maiming one U.S. soldier."

"Not bad—not bad at all," said Lt. Col. Michael Donnelly, who claimed the attack is conclusive proof that the tide in Iraq is somewhat turning in a vaguely less-ghastly direction. "This is hardly the parade of death and destruction we've grown accustomed to. In fact, I've recently received word that our injured soldier isn't even going to lose his other leg."